Softer Side
by Angel Dove1
Summary: Exploring an abandoned building, Ed is exposed to a strange gas that changes him into a cat. Roy finds Ed and shows the cat a softer side to him. What will happen when Roy finds out it's really Ed. Warnings in each chapter M/M N/C much later
1. Chapter 1

Hello everyone. I know this isn't one of my normal stories. I don't even know where I came up with this one, but I can tell you that it's going to be a short one with short chapters. I'll have fast updates with barely any time in between them hopefully. I think this is me trying to get out of my last horrible story. I'm just giving this chapter a run through. If people like it I'll continue the story. If no one does then I'll either delete it or update slower whenever I feel like adding another chapter. Just a warning, I'm not very good at writing stories that have one plot line. LOL It'll be slow moving for the first four chapters, but after that I promise it'll get a little more interesting before the end.

Thank you for choosing this store. It gives me great pride that someone is reading it. Hopefully I'll eventually publish my real book. LOL Cold day in hell whenever I have the courage for that. Until then I'll continue to write these stories. Anyway onward.

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Chapter One

This is a very private journal entry. When writing the report for this particular accident, I left out this entire entry, but my mind continued to ruffle around everything that happened. I want to settle the fear the resides now in my heart. If you are reading this, you must have found it buried in the depths of the new Central library. I know that sounds stupid hiding a book there where anyone could read it, but I've only known one person that would read random books that isn't related to what they are researching. I ask you one thing if you continue. Don't judge me or anyone that I've mentioned. Don't tell them about this. I'm trusting you with a secret that I couldn't hid any longer. I warn you that this isn't a very nice, peaceful story. It may appear it in the beginning, but it gets ten times worst. You have been warned. If I hear anything that I'm going to say in any sort of rumor, I'll hunt you down and make you wish you've never told anyone. This entry deserves justice, but it needs to remain a secret until I'm ready for people to know.

_Edward Elric_

Standing in the middle of a large deserted building wasn't anything new to me. I couldn't tell you how many times I found myself alone and searching for ways to return to our normal bodies. I didn't want Al to know that I found someone who may have clues to the whereabouts of a Philosopher's Stone. Especially after finding out the real one needed to use human souls. This new information sounded too simple for my taste. A temporary one could be made by mixing gases together and will have enough power for one wish (lack of better words). This had to be a trap, but even now, there was no one around. My eyes scanned the brunt walls and dusty floors. I was giving this person another two minutes before I gave up and returned to my room where Al thought I was sleeping.

A soft clicking noise sounded from somewhere in the other room. It's strange that I didn't pick up on it earlier. I move quietly through the entranceway leading to the hall. Off to the right were stairs leading up to the second floor. I searched the stairs and underneath them, but the clicking noise wasn't coming from there. The further I moved into the place, the more difficult it became to see. I don't know what drew me to the sound. It didn't sound like clicking to a time bomb. It sounded more like someone was tapping on metal with a fingernail or something else small.

I ran my fingers along the splintered wall, avoiding the uneven areas. Pressing my ears against it, I could hear the clicking noise coming from behind it. I clasps my hands together and formed a doorway. I didn't want to wonder around in this area, looking for a way behind this wall. I grasped the handle and very carefully opened the door. On the first sight in, I saw nothing that could be making that noise, but then I found it. Off in the corner was a tube of some strange gas that was leaking out. Directly below it was a broken machine, making the clicking noise, sparking fire. "Oh crap," I said, running as fast as I could. I managed to make it to the other room, but the place rumbled from the explosion, knocking me off my feet. Lucky for me it didn't bring the whole place down.

I placed my human hand over my mouth to block the gas that was spreading all around the building. It didn't help one bit. My eyes stung and watered. My whole body stiffed, and the only thing that continued to work was my automail. Unfortunately, my mind slipped faster than I could make it out of the building. The gas moved like fog through the building, igniting another explosion from somewhere else. This time it wasn't a small one. "I'm sorry, Al," I remembered whispering as the building started to come down. I felt everything shaking and heard plaster and cement crashing down. My mind blacked out, and I saw nothing after that.

The next part gets a little unbelievable, but trust me it happened.

I awoke, buried under small pieces of rubble from what I felt on top of me. My head still felt groggy, and my body had trouble moving. I tried to get up on my hands and knees, but that didn't work too well. I could barely feel my hands much less move my knees. I opened my eyes and looked around. Everything was in strange colors, and I could see further than normal. Just thinking it was the side affects to the gas, I managed to push myself up to a standing position. I flailed my arms to keep myself upright, but my body crashed back down. Something was wrong. I couldn't keep my back straight. I panicked. Choosing to move however I could, I pressed my hands firmly on the ground and moved my feet to do the same. I was surprised at how easy it was to move myself that way. Pressing my hands to the floor didn't hurt, nor did it feel like my butt was sticking up in the air. I knew I was small, but I didn't think I could move my body like this.

Slow but sure, I exited the building and started down the alleyways of Central. To my surprise, there was no one around the building. I could have sworn the explosion was loud enough to alert someone. To my dismay, I found no one in the alleyways leading back to the main street. I crawled/walked further when something touched the back of my leg. I turned around quickly, but no one was there. Something touched it again, and I turned back around. No one again. Fearing that it was some stranger messing with me or an illusion brought on by the gas, I tried to ignore it and moved onto the main street. I found someone about a block away from me. I tried to shout to her, but the only noise that came out was a meow. At first I thought it was a cat around me and I couldn't talk. I turned around and around, but I saw no cat. I tried again, and the same noise came out.

Breathing heavier, I finally understood what was going it. I ran back to the building that I came from and hid underneath the rubble, wishing that I could change back to normal. The thing touching the back of my legs must have been my tail. No wonder my vision was different, and I couldn't walk. I curled up and cried for a few minutes before getting tired of hearing my own small meows. How was I ever going to explain this to Coronal Mustang or even Al? I was trapped in a cat's body with no way of telling anyone.

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That's the first chapter. Like I said if someone likes it I'll keep going. If not I'll just delete it. I don't know where this came from, but it seems stranger than my normal stories. Thank you for reading please review.

Angel Dove


	2. Chapter 2

Why yes I am continuing LOL. Thank you thank you thank you. At least it wasn't too odd for everyone. Again it's another boring type chapter with very little going on, but you'll see where I'm going with this after awhile. I promise. Still no warnings in this chapter.

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Chapter Two

I don't know how long I remained under the rubble. I knew it had to be a few days. All the gas was long gone. My whole body continued to grow weaker. I knew I had to get something to eat soon, but I had no way of hunting for myself. In the first day, I managed to teach myself how to move in my new body. Of course the first few jumps were misses and I fell to the ground, but I managed to get my timing right, and I found that I could jump high for a cat. Going to the bathroom was the oddest thing. It made me glad I was back here all alone. Even that loneliness started to get to me. I found myself thinking about Al and everyone in the military. My ears perked up to noise coming down the alleyway. It sounded like someone walking. Heavy boots, must have been military. This was the first time someone came to investigate this building.

I was about to dive back down under the rubble, when I noticed a familiar form. Mustang. I froze in sight. I couldn't believe he would walk all the way over here. I backed away slightly. I knew how he was with people, and I feared what he would do to a cat. "I thought something happened back here," he whispered. I could barely pick up on what he was saying. His eyes drifted down and spotted me. His eyes softened and he lowered himself to one knee. "Hello, little guy." He held out his hand to me. "Come here. I'm not going to hurt you."

Figuring this would be my only chance, I moved up to him. He pet me on the back and then ran his fingers along my fur. I purred unconsciously. He picked me up and placed me in his arms. "You know. I remember a sweet boy who tried to con someone like you off on me. I was seriously considering it since he was so determined. I don't know what he did with the cat." I looked up at him. He was considering keeping Al's cat. He stopped talking and stared into my eyes. "You have his exact eyes." Roy glanced up as the rain I was sensing earlier poured down. "Well, I guess you're coming home with me. Don't squirm so much." He placed me under his jacket and ran off. I've never known Mustang to run to anything. He always seemed to stroll and never was in a hurry for anything.

The water started soaking through his jacket. The rain fell hard. I heard a door open and closed. Mustang's home. I was never here. In fact I don't remember ever knowing where he lived. He takes me out of his jacket and placed me down on the couch. I was surprised at how comfortably I sat in his arms. I knew I was small, probably smaller than a normal cat. He must think I'm a kitten. I looked up at him and saw the water dripping rapidly off his clothes and hair. He discarded his clothes without a care of me seeing him naked. I turned my head and looked at the arm of the couch. I'm sure cats saw all sorts of people naked, but I'm not some normal cat.

He knelt down in front of me. "What's the matter, Edward?" I looked at him and stared into his eyes. How? "You like that name? I thought it was cute for you. You have his eyes, and your fur is the same color of his hair." He's naming a cat after me just because it looks like him. I meowed my approval, still trying not to look at his naked form. "Let's see about getting you something to eat." He picked me up and grabbed a towel that was thrown carelessly on the floor from who knows when. He placed me down on the counter and threw the towel over me. I lifted my head and tried to get the towel off me. I didn't like being in the dark. Finding the light, I moved my body towards it and nearly fell off the counter.

Roy caught me and placed me back on the counter. He now had a towel wrapped around his waist and placed a bowl of milk on the counter before placing me down on it. I stared at it and frowned. I hated milk. Of course he would think of feeding me that. Not even my new cat senses was intrigued by the smell. I sat down on my hind legs and stared up at him. "I should have known a cat that looks like Ed wouldn't like milk." He went through his fridge and cabinets to find something that a cat would like. I'd eat anything but milk right at this moment. He opened up at can of tuna, and my senses went wild. Something about that smell made me want to hunt it down. He spooned it on a plate and set it down in front of me. I devoured the tuna as fast as I could get it in my mouth using only my lips and tongue. I wanted to use my paws, but I knew I'd never be able to grip it.

Roy chuckled and patted my back gently. "I guess I better invest in cans of tuna from now on." I looked up at him. It sounded as if he was planning on keeping me. It left a warm sensation in the pit of my stomach. I wouldn't have imagine him being so nice. I finished eating and glanced up at his smiling face. He really enjoyed watching me do things. I yawned and licked my paw. "I was thinking the same thing." He picked me up and carried me upstairs. I never knew being carried around felt so great. I was enjoying this time as a cat, but I really wanted to return to my normal self.

"Stay here. I'm going to take a hot shower." I glanced up at him for a second and then curled myself up on the soft bed that he set me on. He smiled and disappeared down the hall. I was going to get up and explore the room, but I felt so tired. I must have fell asleep for a little bit because the next thing I knew, Mustang was getting into bed. I got up and moved over so he could position himself comfortably before lying back down next to him. He ran his fingers gently through my fur for a few minutes. I fell back to sleep feeling safe and comfortable for the first time in several days.

The next morning, I awoke to Mustang groaning and a loud pounding noise. "Alright. Alright," he mumbled flipping the covers over on me and walking across the floor. Fearing something was going on, I hid under the bed. I heard voices downstairs that I recognized. I ran down the stairs, falling halfway down and tumbled. I felt hands wrap around my small body and lift me up. "Clumsy cat," Mustang commented.

"Since when did you get a cat."

"None of your concern, Lieutenant. Why are you here so early in the morning?"

"Al ran into the office searching for his brother. We've looked all over Central but couldn't find him anywhere. He said Ed's been gone for several days. He gave him two days before getting concerned."

"Sounds like nothing new for the shrimp." Growling I bit his hand. He dropped me. "Stupid cat." I darted under the couch, fearing the anger in his voice.

Hawkeye laughed. "Looks like he doesn't like you calling Ed names. But, seriously, sir, Al is very concerned."

"Take Breda, Havoc, and Falman. Search all the usual places for Fullmetal. Have Fuery and Al meet me here in a half hour. We'll search the east side of Central."

"Yes, sir." I heard the door close, but refused to move out from under the couch. I was afraid he would turn into the usual Mustang and kick me or something.

He reached under the couch and pulled me out. I tried to claw him, but he held my front paws firmly in his hands. "Easy now." I glanced up at him as he pet my head. "I'm going out in a half hour. Let's get you something to eat." He carried me back into the kitchen. "Ed usually disappears, but not without his brother and not for several days. Something seems wrong." He looked down at me and set another plate of tuna. I didn't eat it immediately at first. His face showed concern. He was worried about me, and I couldn't even tell him I was right here. "Everything is okay. Go ahead and eat." I lowered my head and ate slowly. He left sometime during my meal and got dressed. I jumped off the counter and landed gracefully on the floor. Walking into the living room, I jumped up on the couch and sat next to where he stood. I desperately wanted to go with him. Maybe if I led him back to the building he could investigate it and find some clues to what happened to me.

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Another chapter down. I swear it'll get interesting soon. Give me another two chapters. Thanks for reading please review

Angel Dove


	3. Chapter 3

Thank you again for your kind reviews. I hope I'm not losing anyone. The next chapter is the last non-action chapter and that'll be up tomorrow. Then I'll have something interesting on Thursday for everyone. No warnings again.

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Chapter Three

A knock came at the front door again. Al was here. Mustang walked over to the door and opened it up. The tall armor entered the room. "This isn't like him, Coronal. He hasn't mentioned meeting with anyone or going anywhere. He'd never leave me behind like this."

"Calm down, Al. We'll find him."

"He can't possibly be anywhere in Central, and there's no records of him leaving here. Winry heard nothing from him, and she's on her way here." Great. I knew this couldn't be simple. I disappear for a couple of days and he calls Winry. I'll never hear the end of this. Trust me. To this day, she still rubs it in my face. She doesn't know that ever time she mentions it, all these memories resurfaces. I'm not angry with her. It'd be different if she knew exactly what happened. But, I'm getting off subject so let me get you back on track.

"That just means he's somewhere in Central. We're going to split from here. Fuery will take the southern eastern part of Central. Check every house, every street. Ask anyone you can find. Al, you take northern eastern part of Central. Go against the usual. You know Ed the best. We'll meet back here in eight hours. If you're not finished with your section by then, we'll wait for you. Take your time and investigate every tip."

"Yes, sir."

The two walked out the door while Mustang walked back and grabbed his jacket. This would be my chance of guiding him to the building. The only problem was I didn't know where Mustang's house was compared to the building. Maybe he'll walk towards it without me. I took a running start off the arm of the couch and jumped onto his back, clinging with my claws. "Ow ow ow ow." He reached around and grabbed me. "You can't come with me. You'll be safe here, Edward." He went to put me down on the couch again, but I clung to his sleeve. He looked down at me. "What is it with you? You don't act like a normal cat." He fixed me so I was sitting in his crossed arms. I clapped my front paws together much like how I used to. Mustang stared at me. "How did you…? I'm losing it. Fine. You can come with me."

He carried me through the streets, turning every now and then until we reached an area that I recognized hours later. I squirmed and jumped out of his arms. "Hey!" I jumped up and down until he walked towards me. Making sure not to lose him, I ran all the way back to the building he discovered me at. "Do you have family here?" I shook my head. He remained shocked for a few seconds. I knew he probably thought he was going nuts, but I had to get him to look around this area. I sat back on my hind legs and clapped my paws together again. "Ed was here?" I nodded and walked further into the half collapsed building. He followed me until I stopped at the door I made leading into the room. He entered into the room, glancing around at all the chard furniture. He carefully opened a manila folder and read a few lines. I used my teeth to pull on his pant leg. I wanted to know what he was reading. Maybe I could help him figure out the clues.

He glanced down at me with suspicion but decided ignore his better judgment. "Oh sorry. It said that the gas was some sort of transformation one. They started testing on animals." He knelt down and petted me on the head. "Were you one of those poor animals?" I shook my head. "Alright. I already think I'm crazy so let's hear it. Was Ed here." I nodded. "Did something happened to him?" I nodded again. I knew he was smart, but jeeze he's being slow. "Do you know where he is?" I nodded again. He kept getting so close. "Can you take me to him?" I didn't move or nod or anything. I thought he would get the hint, but he didn't. "Yeah, I lost it." He picked me up again and walked with me back to the house. I wanted him to remain there, but nothing I did could get him to go back to the building. He didn't look too long for me. In fact, it was like he cared more about me as a cat than me as a person.

I put my head down on his arms. They'll never find me. I'll be stuck forever as a cat. Opening the door to his house, he left it open and collapsed down on the couch. I sat on his lap, attempting to get his attention again. "I don't know what to do. I feel helpless just like when those boys got themselves into trouble at laboratory five. Hearing about what happened from Hughes was enough to cause nightmares. When I suggested that they take the exam, I didn't want them getting into this much trouble. How many times did they get into trouble and didn't tell me? I moved back here expecting to be able to protect them more, but I barely see them." He sighed and petted my head again. "He's going to be seventeen, and he's seen more hardships than I had when I was seventeen."

Hollow, heavy footsteps announced Al returning. I guess we were sitting here longer than I thought. It did take Mustang a while to get to the building. Time seemed to move differently as a cat. "I found nothing," Al commented and noticed me sitting on Mustang's lap. "When did you get a cat?"

"Found him last night."

"What's his name?"

Mustang sat there for a second and sighed. "Edward." Al chuckled. "The cat choose the name."

"Oh did he? I've seen the looks you give my brother." I glanced up at Al. He knew more than me.

"That isn't something we are talking about."

"What if I told you the feelings were mutual?" I wanted to bite Al, but I knew he wouldn't feel it.

"Age difference, Al. Plus, it's against military law. I'm his boss." Mustang continued to pet me.

"Where did you find him?" Al asked, changing the subject obviously on purpose.

"At an abandoned building. I think whoever was there was doing experiments on him."

"The poor thing. Are you going to keep him."

"Probably. He's not too much trouble and doesn't make a lot of noise unlike your brother." Al laughed and looked at the door just as Fuery walked in.

He shook his head and stood by the door. "I found nothing, sir. No one has seen him or even heard from him."

Mustang picked me up again and walked over to the door. "Let's find out if the other's found him. They should be back at headquarters by now."

"Um, sir, are you going to bring that cat?" Fuery asked giving me a strange look, but nearly as strange of a look he gave Mustang. This must be out of character for the great Coronal Mustang to carry a cat.

"Yeah, he doesn't like to be left alone." I meowed happily. At least for awhile he'll continue to bring me everywhere. I could find out things that the others found and maybe try to link it to clues that I could give Mustang. Maybe eventually, I'll convince him that I'm Edward Elric.

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One more chapter left before I add some action. I promise not much longer. Please have more patience. Thank you for reading please review.

Angel Dove


	4. Chapter 4

I'm sorry I didn't mean to keep mentioning it. I'm still a little insecure about the story. Thank you anyway for your reviews. I'm enjoying this story. I'm going to keeping going. Still no warnings in this chapter.

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Chapter Four

The trip to headquarters was intriguing. So many different smells and random objects floating around. These things I would ignore walking around on my own seemed to fascinate me more. My head turned to each noise and object flying through my peripheral vision. Mustang petted the back of my head, and I stared up at him. I had to wonder what was so important about the cat in his arms. I didn't understand why he cared about it so bad. He doesn't know it's me. I glanced up at Al. For someone who loved animals, Al didn't acknowledge me. I placed my head down in his arms and enjoyed the rest of the ride, attempting to ignore everything that was going on around me.

Mustang deposited me on the couch in his office. I moved from the right side to the left where I normally sat during my debriefings. He never noticed that hint. In fact, he sat down at his desk and looked at the paperwork. I didn't understand at all. If I was missing, why was he not doing more to look for me? Was he hiding the fact that he was worried? Did he not care about me that much? I curled up on the couch not paying attention to anyone in the room. I knew that sometime later the rest of Mustang's unit returned from their individual search. I bet you can guess what sort of results they had.

I've learned that cats should never drop their guard. They should always know what is going on. Suddenly a voice sounded, "Edward! Edward! It's so good to see the you're alright. Everyone's so worried about you. How did you get in that form anyway?" I lifted my head and stared into the face of a panting dog. To this day I don't know how he knew it was me. I don't even know how I understood what he was saying. Shrieking in a noise that I didn't know a cat or even me could make, I clawed my way away from the face and ran underneath Mustang's desk. Black Hayate continued to shove his noise underneath the desk. Voices sounded through the room, but I could only distinguish one. "I didn't think it was you at first, but you smell just like your clothes. I can't imagine how you must feel, being once a human now a cat and not being able to tell anyone. Oh, I smell a treat." He banged his head against the table and ran off somewhere. I could feel my fur standing on ends. Even though I knew who the dog was, something was making me fear him. Something that I didn't recognize.

I felt two hands wrap around me. I struggled at first and moved to another part of the desk. "Hawkeye, get that dog out of here. The rest of you, get back out there and find Ed! The next time I hear from one of you, it better be to tell me you found him and he's safe." Mustang's face came under the desk just as I heard the door slam. "Easy now. He was just saying hello." I refused to move. "He's gone. I'll protect you." Wrapping his hands around me, I finally let him pick me up. He placed me in his lap and gently petted me until I felt my fur flatten out. I wanted to cry. Besides understanding what was going on around me, I could barely control myself anymore. I feared that another hour in this form, I'd remain forever as a cat. That couldn't happen. Someone had to help Al return to his human body. He would never know what happened to me. I could only imagine what would happen to him.

After several minutes, I was fully calmed down. Mustang's hands were mesmerizing. Each stroke of his large hands over my body rubbed away more stress and anxiety. He stopped after a while and worked on the paperwork in front of him. I didn't mind. Feeling his warmth was enough for me at that moment. I fell asleep shortly after. Nothing bothered me until Mustang picked me up and carried me through the doorway of his office. Everything was dark and deserted except for a few lights that remained on at some of the desks. The others must not have still been looking for me. I knew they would never find anything. That gas was long gone, and unless there was something in that folder that screamed they were going to test it on a human then I was screwed.

Mustang shut all the lights off and closed the door behind him. "I swear, Ed, if you turn up safe and sound, you won't be for long," I heard him hiss under his breath. He continued to walk slowly through headquarters and out on the street. He obviously hoped that someone would come with information. He stopped at a store on the way home and set me down on the window. "Stay here. I need to buy you more tuna before we get home, and they won't let animals in the store." I glanced up at him and sat on my hind legs. I was tempted to play hard to get, but I knew if he wasn't trying hard to find the real me, he wouldn't bat an eye to me leaving. It took him several minutes to return to me. When he walked out the door, I jumped off the windowsill and stood next to him. He had two bags in his arms, and I knew he wouldn't be able to carry me as well. He smiled and walked towards his house. I followed close behind him. He glanced back ever now and then just to make sure he didn't loose me.

The night wasn't like our first night together. He fed me food in the kitchen, but this time it was on the floor. He disappeared into the living room instead of watching me eat. Curious at what he was doing, I only ate half of the tuna and moved to the other room. He sat on the couch in just a pair of shorts flipping through a book. I could barely tell what he was reading only because he would put it down to write something on a notepad. I jumped on the back of the couch to look over his shoulder, but the words were hard to read. He rubbed his eyes and placed the book down on his lap. He looked much tired than I ever seen him. Maybe the reason he wasn't looking for me was because he had something else on his mind. Maybe he was too tired to go looking for me. I never even considered that.

Mustang rose and walked up the stairs. He never even noticed me. I watched him undress and move into the bathroom. I figured if I was going to remain his cat, I better get used to him undressing randomly. I jumped up in the bed and lied down on the far end. Like last night, I waited until he was comfortably positioned in the bed before I curled up behind him. Instead of lying on his back, he curled around me and draped his arm over me. It was strangely comforting to feel his heat around me. I felt a strange tingling feeling in my legs. I ignored that at the time when I shouldn't have. If I would have just hid under the bed or moved away from Mustang when I started feeling this strange sensation, then maybe things would have turned out differently.

I'm going to go ahead and tell you want is happening. I sort of figured it out how it happened later on. The gas that I breathed in was unstable. It was meant to change a human into the animal that their personality best suits. Don't ask me why I changed to a cat. Upon administrating the counter gas, the human/animal would change back to their normal self. Like I said, it was unstable. Once the gas was fully through my system, my body began to change naturally back to normal. It started in the legs. They grew out to my normal automail and human legs. My back straightened out and the fur started to draw back into my body. The most unfortunate thing about changing back to human while asleep is waking up naked next to the man you were beginning to have feelings for. I didn't know at the time, but I admired him more than I thought. The feelings of resentment and constant playing the stubborn child was all a ploy to attract his attention. I'm sorry to admit this, but I was falling in love with my superior. A man if you would believe it.

I'm giving you the choice now. From this point on the story becomes very difficult to read. Things happened to me that made me feel worst than ever. If this is getting too weird for you don't flip the page over. If you can't handle things that degrade people, don't flip the page. I won't blame you or call you a coward because it's taken me this long to write what really happened. Make your choice and either close the notebook or flip the page.

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The next chapter is a little difficult to read but not as difficult as the following chapter. I'll start the warnings in the next chapter so you'll know what will happen before it does. I won't leave you in the dark. Like Ed said, the story is going to get extremely dark for several chapters. If you're not a fan of dark fics it'll be okay if you want to skip the rest. If you're sticking with me, I'll see you in a day. The next chapter will be up tomorrow. As always, thank you for reading and please review.

Angel Dove


	5. Chapter 5

I'm sorry if I'm losing some of you. I never intended this story to be a fluffy love story with nothing dark in it. I'm not good at making stories like that. Thank you again for your reviews. Again I warn you. For the next two chapters it gets dark and then the chapters after that is recovery. This one isn't nearly as bad at the next one.

Warning: Violence, language, emotional damage and a prelude to the next chapter

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Chapter Five

The conscious world isn't the easiest thing to wake up to. In fact, how many times have you just lied in bed, wishing to go back to that dream filled sleep? Today was no different than any of those days. I would have given my life and soul to the devil if I could have remained asleep or was somewhere else other than lying next to Mustang on his bed. Forgive the watermarks on the pages. Even though the hurt is shallow now, it still remains. This day echoes in my mind over and over again. I hope by the time I finish writing this journal I'll start down the road of recovery. I think I stalled enough.

Waking the next morning was difficult. It was much like when I woke up in the form of a cat. My senses had to readjust to normalcy. The first thing I noticed was the inability to curl myself into a ball. My back ached, and my foot slid across something metal and cold. My confused mind was having trouble sending information to my brain. I knew deep down inside that I was human again, but everything felt so different. When I opened my eyes, not only could I see lots of color again, but the brightness hurt, causing the headache to intensify. I closed my eyes and buried my head into the sheets, attempting to dispatch the ray of sunlight shinning over me.

I felt Mustang move slightly beside him. My movements must have woken him up. I'm sure he wasn't a deep sleeper judging by the dark circles that I noticed under his eyes last night. I wonder if it had anything to do with Hughes dying. That was my first shocking information I received whenever Al and I returned to Central. I felt sympathy for the first time for Mustang. I knew him and Hughes were friends, but I didn't realize they were so close. Even through my anger at finding out what happened to him, I could clearly see vengeance in the coronal's eyes and something more. I knew he was depressed and hating himself for not being there to help his friend. I believed that was the real reason he returned to Central. He wanted to find Hughes's killer. I didn't blame him not once. I knew how he felt.

I flipped over and sat on the bed, gazing at his soft, peaceful features. Even though I hated his cocky attitude, I had great respect for him. He opened many doors for my brother and I and didn't judge us. It was like he understood what we were feeling. I ran my human hand over his face, contemplating another taboo. My feelings for him were growing as I discovered more and more of his softer side. I stilled my hand for a second and stared at it. Human. It was human flesh. I pulled it away from Mustang and stared at it like it was a foreign object. Squeezing my fingers shut and forming a fist, I glanced over at my automail hand. I was back to normal. Excitement filled my senses. Now I can tell Mustang what really happened. I know he won't be too thrilled hearing that I was a cat and he carried me around for about two days, but I couldn't contain my enthusiasm for changing back.

"Mustang," I whispered, loving the sound of a normal voice even though it sounded a bit strained. I watched him curl in on himself more. Apparently he wasn't used to someone waking him up. I pulled the covers down. "Roy!" I said on accident. I don't know what made me call him by his first name, but that was enough to get him to open his eyes. It took him a few minutes to figure out that I was calling him.

He shot up in his bed and looked at me. The confusion in his eyes melted away and was replaced by anger. I've never seen him look angry at me. I thought it was because I woke him up. I wasn't prepared for anything that followed. "Fullmetal, how the hell did you get in here? Where are your clothes? Do you know how worried Al has been for you? I had everyone looking for you and you show up here out of all places with no clothes on. Shouldn't you be thinking about going to see your brother?" Every hateful word pushed me further away. I backed off the bed and away from him. He didn't understand. I wanted to cry, but I fought ever tear that threatened to fall.

"But," I said softly once my back hit against the windowsill. I didn't know how to get him to understand. Everything wasn't how I expected it to be. I thought he would hug me and tell me how worried he was. I thought he would ask where I've been and listen to my story. I wanted to return to that cat form and run as fast as I could. I glanced from Mustang to the door. There was no way I could run around him and get out the door. My heart felt worst than seeing my brother walking through his door worried about me.

"But nothing. Haven't I hinted enough to you that you shouldn't be wondering around on your own? I thought I was going to find your body. But, no, you show up at my house with no bruises or any signs that you're hurt. You had this big smile on your face like you had the best fuck of your life and you were coming to brag about it." I closed my eyes and said nothing while he ranted on about my recklessness and heartless act. I reached behind me and felt the handle to the window. It would be a two story drop. I was sure my automail leg could handle the fall. I just wanted to get away from him as fast as possible. He would never understand.

He got out of bed and started towards me. I couldn't hold on anymore. One tear fell after another. I popped the window and jumped out it faster than I ever remembered my reflexes being. "Shit. Ed!" I heard Mustang shout from his window. "Ed, wait!" I couldn't be near him anymore. Once I gained my balance, I took off running. I don't know where my mind was taking me, but at that point I didn't care. I wanted to be as far away from Mustang as possible. I never expected him to be so angry. I've seen him getting disappointed and almost ever other type emotion that he accidentally leaked through his emotionless mask, but never anger. Tears blurred my vision, blocking the strange looks I was getting from random people as I ran through the streets, wearing nothing.

I stopped to catch my breath for a few seconds inside of an alleyway far from random stares. Obviously nobody cared that I was running naked through the streets. They didn't bother to stop me and ask if something was wrong. They probably thought I was some stupid kid running from home. I looked up realizing that I was only a few streets away from the abandoned building that started this all. Fearing that I would get a similar reaction from Al that I got from Mustang, I decided to walk back to that building and look for my clothes. I assumed they were buried under the rubble that I crawled out of.

I knelt down and started digging through dirt and cement. I wished I was a cat again so I could crawl through the small hole and pull my clothes out. Reaching my arm in, I finally pulled out my jacket. Thanking every god out there that my clothes were still here, I continued to dig until I found my pants. Everything else could wait. I just needed to cover myself enough to get back into the room where my brother and I were staying. I was just about to put my clothes on when I felt two arms wrap around my body and pulled me away from my clothes. The person grabbed my arms and painfully pulled them behind my back. I heard several voices snickering.

"These fake limbs aren't as attractive, but take them away he could be a great fuck. Small, blond, innocent, and young. Just like the boss likes them." I struggled and tried to pull my arms closer together so I could clap my hands, but they pulled too tightly on me.

"Let go!" I screamed, kicking at the other person that came into view, but missing.

They guy popped my automail arm off in the worst way possible. I screamed from the pain. It felt like my real arm was being removed again. He threw it down on the ground and I could see some of the nerve wires hanging off it. He not only damaged the circuits in the arm but the ones in my shoulder. I wouldn't be able to snap it back in. Fearing what was going to happened, I used my foot and kicked one of the men right in the face, breaking his nose. He screamed and held his hand over his face as the blood gushed out of it. "This bitch is a lot of trouble." I felt something strong hit the back of my head and darkness engulfed me.

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I know I'm so evil a cliffhanger. Please don't kill me. The next chapter will be out tomorrow I promise. I hope I managed to spike everyone interest now. The rest of the story will be better than the first few chapters. I promise. Thank you for reading please review.

Angel Dove


	6. Chapter 6

Thank you all for your kind reviews. I'm glad I managed to not scare you away. This is my darkest chapter in the entire story. They'll be a whole list of warnings coming up in a few seconds. If any of them bother you please skip this chapter. I'm taking this from the sweet loving story for a few chapters. I'm going to drop Ed down to ground zero and then raise him back up again because that's my favorite part of the story. I love writing about people recovering from all sorts of events. It gives me courage to live my own life.

Warnings: Violence, language, and the most important one rape. This degrading event isn't to be taken lightly. I'm in complete understanding if you get bothered by it and can't read this chapter.

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Chapter Six

Have you ever noticed that your first senses to return from consciousness is smell and sound? The smell of the area that I was in became the first thing to slaughter my senses. Everything was horrible. It smelt worst than rotten fish soaking in sour milk. Just the smell of the room gagged me. If it weren't for something in my mouth, I'm sure I would have thrown up that tuna fish I ate the night before. I could feel my stomach tightening and flipping. I used my tongue to try to push the dry object out of my mouth, feeling the contents of my stomach rising slowly in my throat. My eyes stung as my throat's reflex failed, and I vomited whatever I could up. It made me feel worst when half of it went directly back down my throat and some of it dripped pass the object and onto my neck.

I heard snickering from beside me. "What's wrong, slut, have something bad to eat?" I opened my eyes and stared at the disfigured, cubby face of my captor. He was bald, and I could see several tattoos covering his chest.

I shuttered and attempted to move away from the voice, but my arm was tied tightly to what felt like a pole above my head. I moved my feet up; they only moved about a inch. Something was attached to them and kept them in place. I knew that if I pulled hard enough on whatever was tied to my automail leg, I could break it and escape. "I don't think so," the voice said again. This time he was closer to me. His weight pushed down beside me and then was completely on top of my legs. "My boys brought me such a beautiful prize." He traced his fingers along my chest. My human leg began to lose feeling from the weight on top of it. "I was thinking of selling you off to the highest bidder. I would get a great price for a virgin slut."

Something pressed inside of me. I attempted to scream from the discomfort and pain, but all that came out were muffled grunts. "But, I changed my mind. I'd rather be your first and feel that wonderful tight ass of yours. I'd still get a great price for an used item." He licked his lips and placed his hand over my member, pulling his finger out of me. I closed my eyes and let the first few tears to fall. The filth that my mind imagined was worst than what he was doing at that moment. The vile taste of vomit plagued my senses, but I fought it better. I didn't want the experience of swallowing it again. "Prepare yourself, bitch. We have five beautiful hours ahead of us."

You would think I'd be thankful that it was only five hours, but you have no idea. Your mind focuses on ever agonizing second. It started with him tying a thin rope around my member. It was so tight that I thought if I moved wrong, I could sever my organ. Ever touch he made on my skin left a trail of disgust. I pulled at my wrist and feet. I needed to free myself from the suffering, but nothing was moving. Nothing gave me the sweet satisfaction of kicking his ass. I blamed Mustang for everything. It was his fault for tempting me to come to Central and become an alchemist. It was his fault that I was in that building looking for clues on how to get my brother and I back to normal. But, most of all, it was his fault for causing me to run down the street naked. Even though my mind wrapped around everything I could anger myself for, I knew that I couldn't blame Mustang for it. I would act the same if I was in his shoes. It was my fault. I was the one that was the coward and ran away. I should have stood my ground and accepted his anger with pride.

Minutes went by as he continued to caress my body until erection. My member throbbed, and I could feel something leaking from it. His fingers released the rope on my throbbing member slightly but not enough to cause less pain. Without warning, he entered into me. I screamed through the gag and my tears fell rapidly. Moving in and out of me with rapid speed, I could feel the blood pouring out of me. Every nerve stung. When he released with a stingily, sickening stratification, I felt relief wash over me. I didn't know how much time went by, but I prayed he was done.

I relaxed more after he pulled out of me and moved off my legs. "Fucking bitch didn't cum for me. I should punish you for that." He ripped the gag out of my mouth. I was breathing heavier. I didn't know what he wanted me to say or do. Pain was everywhere in my body. I heard something making a vibrating noise and the rope was removed.

"Please," I begged, hearing the strain in my voice for the first time.

"Of course, you little whore." He shoved the vibrator inside of me so fast that I let out of gasp and unconscious moan when it hit the bundle of nerves. I saw spots of white and cursed myself for the noise I was making. He got up on the bed again and sat on my shoulders. He shoved his dick into my mouth. Let me tell you how vile and disgusting it tasted. All my senses were clashing against each other. Everything came all at once; his disgusting release that I spat most of it out and my shameful release. My vision blackened, and I felt my consciousness come crashing down.

I don't know how long I was unconscious, but when I returned to reality, I was still lying chained to the bed. This time no one was around me. I don't know what overcame me after awakening. I was determined to free myself from this place. Twisting my body every which way, I managed to dip my thumb into my mouth to rewet the semen that lined my mouth and cheeks. I didn't know if it would work, considering that semen was a sticker substance than water. I drew an alchemist circle on the chain that tied my arm to the pole. I saw the most beautiful thing in my life at that moment; the soft blue glow of alchemy. My arm dropped as I quickly got up and used the same thing with the chains at my feet. My body screamed from the movement, but I didn't care. My only thoughts were getting out of this place.

I ripped the wooden door opened, leading into a dark hallway and limped my way out of what seemed like a deserted building. I half expected guards to be positioned outside of my room, but they didn't know that I was an alchemist. Delightful for my luck, I managed to move out of the building and down the dirty walkway that led to another alleyway without being noticed by anyone. Choosing to deal with my pain once I was free of this place, I ran as fast as I could through the random streets.

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Four more chapters to go. The worst is now over. The rest will be the recovery. Thank you for reading please review.

Angel Dove


	7. Chapter 7

Thank you again for your kind reviews. I'm started to slow up with writing, but don't worry. I'll still have one chapter uploaded each day. There's an estimated three more chapters after this one. I'm not sure if I want to write the last chapter or not. It's really nothing to do with the story just something extra that some might want, but I'll talk about that later. This chapter isn't going to be too long. I want to put most of the work in the next chapter. Anyway onward.

Warnings: Recap to what happened not in much detail.

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Chapter Seven

I've never thought that I would envy Al right at this moment. To be able to run nonstop without feeling the aching muscles or the out of breath sensations. I stopped for a few minutes, attempting to catch my breath. Hiding in-between two buildings, my whole body stung and screamed. I could feel blood rolling down my thighs. I knew I wasn't going to last much longer. My vision was already started to blur, and I could barely feel anything from my waist down. I didn't know who to trust, and I wanted to return to Mustang's house, but I was lost.

None of the buildings looked familiar. In fact, the streets didn't look like anything I've known. I held onto the corner of the building, moving slowly down the street and turning another corner. No matter whether I turned left or right or continued straight, I couldn't find any direction that led me to a main street. Hearing someone coming, I feared that it was someone coming to take me back to that hell hole. I hid completely in the shadows produced by the setting sun. I found a trashcan further in the small passageway and hid behind it.

I shivered from the cold and fear of anticipation over who it could be. Over my rapidly beating heart, I heard the soft metal footsteps of a familiar sound. Standing up and moving to the edge of the walkway, I grabbed the metal arm and pulled the surprised person into the shadows. Al grabbed my arm and pinned me to the wall. I winced from the pain. "Ed!" he shouted and hugged me.

"Al, please," I whimpered. The pain was becoming too much. I just wanted to hid and heal. Having him near me, eased the fear I was having. "Let me hid inside of your."

"But, brother."

"No time to explain. Please, Al."

"Why are you naked and covered in blood and dirt? What happened, Ed!" Growing frustrated with his constant nagging, I pulled the breastplate off him and struggled to climb inside. He didn't fight me. In fact, he helped me climb in. It felt strange being inside of him, knowing that this was a person. This was my brother, not some hunk of junk or spare armor. "Brother, I'm going to start walking. Are you okay?"

"I'm fine, Al. Please. Let's go back to our room. I promise I'll tell you anything you want to know. Just, please, please get me back there." He didn't protest anymore. My body screamed with each of his motions, but I bit my lip so I wouldn't worry him. I didn't need him stopping. I thanked every god up there for the blessing they/she/he shined down on me. I didn't ask why Al was walking in that part of town. I really didn't care. He was my savor. I felt myself drifting in and out of reality numerous times, but some miracle kept my eyes open.

"Brother, still okay?"

"Yes, I'm fine. Please stop asking. How much further?" Not even standing on my tip toes would I be able to look out through his helmet. I didn't even bother to try. I knew that answer.

"Everybody's been looking for you. I think I should take you to the hospital."

"Don't. I'm begging you. Just this once will you not look out for my wellbeing and do something reckless. I just want to take a bath. I want to get this blood off me."

"Where are you injured? Is it your back?"

"Yeah. It is," I lied. I didn't want to tell him the truth. Not right that moment. Actually, I wanted to forever keep that part from him. As far as I'm concerned, a wound in my back is all he should know. I don't want to dirty his mind. I enjoy the innocence that he still has.

"Mustang is worried about you," Al said suddenly, knocking me out of my thoughts of how life was in Resembool. "He mentioned finding you naked in his room, and he accidentally scared you off. Talk to me. Why were you naked in his house?" The painful memories played over and over again in my mind, causing the once stilled tears to fall. He accidentally? I couldn't believe. I was sure he knew exactly what he was saying to me. "Brother?"

"No one would believe," I whispered.

Al stopped suddenly. "What happened? Tell me now. I'm not waiting until we get back to out room. We still have a half hour walk." Half hour walk? I couldn't believe my ears. I never imaged that we were so far from the room we called a temporary home in the barracks.

"I'm sorry, Al. I failed at finding another way to get our hands on a Philosopher's Stone. I heard that someone knew a way to make one that would give us one wish and didn't require using human souls. I didn't want to get your hopes up so I decided to research it on my own. I…"

"Al!" I knew that voice. I started to shake inside of the armor. I couldn't face him at that moment. He sounded at least a block away. It was difficult to figure out if it was just the echoes from being in the armor or maybe he really was a block away.

"Please don't tell him I'm here."

"I can't lie to Mustang. He's been searching for twelve hours now." Twelve hours. I've been gone for twelve hours. It didn't feel that way at all. I must have been unconscious the first time for much longer than I guessed.

"If you tell him I'm here, I'll take off, and you'll never find me. I swear." I hated making threats like that, but Al was being too stubborn. I didn't have the courage to face Mustang at that moment. I reached up and brushed away a few tears. I couldn't figure out whether I was more upset about telling my brother to lie to Mustang, or knowing that I'd hurt him with that lie.

"Find anything." Mustang was much closer now. I placed my hand on the breastplate and imagined what he would be like. Was he flushed from running? Were those dark circles more visible? Was he wearing his military uniform, or was he wearing his nightwear? I wanted so badly to curl up in his arms and feel his heat like I did when he carried me. I felt my legs give away, and I crashed into the back of Al.

He tumbled slightly. "No, but if I did you'd be the first to know." Al tired to play out his stumble. I was proud and grateful of what he was doing for me. I couldn't tell you how much it meant to me. Slowly getting up, I balanced my weight on my legs again.

"Are you okay, Al?" He must have been swaying or something to alert Mustang's attention after his stumble.

"Yes, I'm fine. There must have been a stone under my foot." My head spun, and I took another fall. This time I knocked Al completely off his feet. I couldn't get up again. "Ed," he said in a whisper, but I knew our cover was blown. "I'm sorry, sir. I lied to you. Ed's inside of me. He asked me not to tell anyone, but he doesn't look too well. Please, help him."

"You traitor," I murmured, unable to stand any longer. Mustang opened Al's chest.

"Edward," he said softly and full of concern. His black eyes reveal all his pain and sorrow. He wasn't trying to hide anything. My eyes drifted shut. I was feeling protected again. "Al, can you walk with him in there? We need to get him to the hospital."

"No," I whispered. I must have looked horrible from my waist up because I knew he couldn't see anything lower than that.

"You have no choice in the matter, Fullmetal. It's a direct order." I groaned and tried to stand up, but all the strength I had was holding my eyes open. I remembered Mustang reaching down to help Al stand up, but the rest of the trip was a blur. I must have fallen asleep sometime through it. To this day, I haven't asked Al how he got me to the hospital. The less I remember of that day the better.

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Another chapter done. YAY! Two or three more chapters left. We are almost through this one. I'll have another chapter up hopefully tomorrow, but I've been running into blocks on that chapter. Hopefully I figure them out soon. LOL Thanks for reading please review

Angel Dove


	8. Chapter 8

So I realized that I accidentally combined two chapters together from my original plan. In order to keep the same amount of chapters, I'm going to add a little something for that missing chapter. This chapter will flow a little different from my original plan and continue into the next chapter until I make up for my woops LOL. Actually it seems to answer some left-over questions that I had when I was planning this story. Thank you all for your kind reviews.

I'm going to pose this question now. The last chapter was going to be a small love scene between Roy and Ed. I've been debating on whether to write it or not. If you want it. Send me a yes, but if you don't I won't be too heartbroken. Like I said I was debating. The original was to not have it, but I could if someone wants it. Anyway let's get this chapter started.

Warnings: Language, some violence not much.

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Chapter Eight

I remembered hearing some muffled voices swimming around my unconscious brain. The theory that a person in a coma can hear you is correct. It was difficult for me to understand what they were saying, but I knew that the doctor told Mustang what I went through. A part of me hoped that he suffered from the knowledge, but the larger part of me wanted him to forget it. I didn't want anyone to know, but of course since I was still considered a minor, they had to inform someone. I'm guessing Mustang pulled rank for that information. My body felt numb, and it pained me to feel it slowly waking.

Cold metal rested gently on my shoulder. I turned my head towards it and saw Al's hand on my shoulder. I closed my eyes again, quickly. He was looking over to the other side of the room, speaking quietly to someone. "You shouldn't blame yourself for this. He still didn't tell me why he was in your room."

"I can't find that cat, Al I'm sure it didn't run off. Ed was naked lying in the same position the cat was. If only I would have put two and two together before I questioned him the way I did." I could hear the pity in Mustang's voice, but I couldn't forgive him. My mind wrapped too much around blaming Mustang for everything. I knew that it was only the rage talking, but I couldn't see the light behind everything. To me, darkness was everything. It was the place I felt safe.

I continued to lie there, hoping that they wouldn't realize that I was awake. I heard Mustang walk towards me. "Isn't possible that the cat escaped when Ed entered?"

He sighed and walked around my bed. "It might be possible, but my door was lock, and he didn't use alchemy to get in. The cat had his exact hair and eye color and kept doing things that I recognized as things that Ed would do."

"How would he become a cat anyway?"

"That's something I'm trying to find out." The door opened and closed. Choosing that time to open my eyes I stared up at Al.

We didn't say anything to each other for a few minutes before I finally spoke up, "Do you know everything that happened to me?"

He nodded. "I'm sorry. I was in the room when Mustang pushed the doctor to tell him. Brother, I'm really sorry."

I could sense the tears that would have been falling down my brother's face. Sitting up slightly as best as I could, I placed my hand on Al's shoulder. "Don't be. It's not your fault. I didn't tell you what was going on. How long have I been out?"

"About a week. The doctor managed to stop the bleeding. You were so close to dying. Winry fixed your arm after we found it by an abandoned building. She went back home for a few days to get more equipment to mend your arm completely. Were you Mustang's cat?" I nodded. "How?"

"The building that I was waiting for that person in ended up being some sort of laboratory where they were testing a gas on animals. I don't know what the gas was suppose to do, but there was an explosion, and it leaked out. When I awoke, I was in the form of a cat. I tried to tell Mustang several times, but it was useless. He didn't understand."

"That's a lie. He didn't understand at that moment, but now he does. He feels guilty for scaring you off. Brother, please forgive him. I know it might be difficult, but please."

I slammed my hand down on the mattress. "Me forgive him? I don't think so. As far as I'm concerned, everything is his fault! He named me Edward. He said I looked like myself. I clapped my paws together and he thought he was losing it. I left as many clues as possible for him, but he didn't understand anything. He thought I was disgusting sitting naked next to him. I don't care that I saw a softer, gentler side of him. You weren't there to see the anger in his eyes or feel the wrath seeping through him. I want nothing to do with him. Go get the doctor so he can release me. We are leaving now."

"Brother, you're taking this too hard."

The fury that continued to plague me spread rapidly through each cell. "Get the doctor, or I'm jumping out that window."

"Alphonse, please wait outside while I examine him," I heard a deep voice say from behind him.

Al instantly put his hands down at his side and turned around. "Why can't I stay in here?"

"Until he calms down would you please wait outside?" The doctor remained just behind Al so I couldn't see him. Al bowed his head and walked out of the door. I didn't feel threatened by the doctor. In fact, I was sure I could convince him to let me leave this place before Mustang returned. I didn't want to see him nor did I care for his apologizes.

"As you wish." Al turned back to me. "I'm going to get you something to eat. Do you want anything in particular?"

"Tuna fish salad on bread," I said quickly without even thinking about it. Al didn't say anything after that. He didn't find it odd that I wanted fish. I just think he was upset at how I was being. He turned back around and bowed again to the doctor. Feeling guilty for everything that I said to him, I glanced down at my automail arm. I could feel that some of the nerves weren't attached completely. She must not have brought enough equipment to mend them all. I flexed my fist in and out, feeling the sensation of bones and muscles moving together even though it was metal and bolts.

"So, Ed. Do you feel any pain?" I shook my head. "Let me ask you something. When he had his dick inside of you, did you enjoy every second of it?"

My eyes widened, and I stared up at the familiar chubby face. I moved off the bed, but he grabbed my arm and injected me with something. It didn't take long for the effects to impair my vision. Everything was looking like I was watching the world through water. My body became sluggish, and I collapsed back on the bed. "Give it up, Edward. You're used merchandise now. The only place that would accept you is the red light district, lying on your back with your legs spread. Or I should say lying in numerous different positioned, moaning in pleasure while every man you could think of sticks their dick in you. Maybe I can loosen you up enough to accept two men at one time. The plans I have for you will make me rich."

He climbed on the bed and pinned my hands above my head. He slid his tongue along the side of face from my neck up to my ear. I shuttered and closed my eyes. Fear of the future he had planned dulled compared to the fear I had of him raping me again. "Please, stop."

He laughed at me, but didn't even make a move like he knew what I said. "No time to romance this round. Your brother will be back soon." He grabbed the hospital gown and pulled it open with one hand. Tears stung my eyes, but they didn't fall. He was right. It was time that I accepted my fate and realized that I wasn't the same Edward Elric anymore. I relaxed my arms and completely gave in to him. What's the use in fighting? It only hurts worse in the end.

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I know everyone hates cliffhangers, but I promise the second I upload this one, I'll start on the next chapter so it shouldn't be too long after that. Thank you for reading please review.

Angel Dove


	9. Chapter 9

So I'm going to work on this while I patiently await the next upload of the newest Fullmetal Alchemist series. I know that I'll have this uploaded way after the newest episode, but at least this will give me something to do until then. LOL Thank you for your kind reviews. I hope you guys like the ending. I'll have a chapter ten. Might take me a little longer or maybe a little less, but it'll be there.

And now finally the entrance of Edward Elric as we all know him. I know I took a long time to get to this point, but I figured I'd leave the best for last. You'll know what I mean.

Warning: Good old ass kicking and bad language n_n

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Chapter Nine

"Look at the great hero of the people now," Mustang's voice echoed in my head. "Lying on his back accepting it all. What are you going to do Fullmetal? Lie there and let him take everything away from you, or are you going to fight?"

His voice haunted my memory. I couldn't tell if he was standing right there egging me on or was my inner thoughts taking on the sound of Mustang's voice. "I can't move," I thought, attempting to reason with the voice.

"When has that stopped you? Get up, Edward. Show him he chose the wrong person." I opened my eyes and glared down at the doctor, rubbing his hands along my stomach. Realizing that my arms were now free, I put everything I had into moving them. I clapped my hands together and changed my automail arm into my usual sword. Slashing randomly, I managed to cut a part of his arm. Blood trickled down his sleeve as he gasped, backing away from me.

"You fucking bitch."

I sat up and held the sword up even though my body visibility swayed. I didn't want him coming near me, but I knew it was only a matter of time before the drug rendered my body useless. I only wished Al would make it back before it did. "You'll be sorry if you come close to me again," I hissed.

He smirked at me. "Judging by the sway in your body, I guess you have one minute before your limbs become useless." He walked over and locked the door. My fear increased, but I tried to hide it. I held the hope that Al would think the locked door meant something was wrong and not the doctor trying to examine me. My back crashed with the mattress, but I managed to keep my automail arm up in front of my chest. He walked towards me as a sudden thought flashed through my mind. I hid my smirk and placed my arms to my side.

I spread my legs and stared at him. "Fuck me and get it over with." I don't know what overcame me. I wanted him close to me. I wanted to make him pay for all the pain he's caused me. Smirking, he climbed on the bed and positioned himself in-between my legs. He leaned down and kissed my stomach. I felt dirtier than the first time, but there was no other way I had to get him to come near me when I still had strength to move my arm. Building all the strength and anger I could muster, I lifted my automail arm and slammed the sword into his back. He gasped and chocked on the blood that began to pour out of his mouth and landed on my chest. He tried to move, but my automail arm remained implanted in his back.

By some miracle, he managed to remove my sword from his back and stagger off me. "Bitch," he groaned. "You'll pay for that." His words were starting to slow and mumble. I knew he had to be dying, and I didn't care. I lied there, watching him crash to the ground in a puddle of blood. I wanted to see his last breath. He choked on more of his blood. A slow agonizing death. I wanted to slow it up more. I wanted him to feel pain unleashing everywhere in his body.

Suddenly the door exploded in a ray of controlled fire. "Ed!" I heard Mustang call my name.

He ran over to my bedside and looked over my body. "Not my blood," I slurred. "Make sure he's dead." He didn't move at first. "What do I have to tell you, Mustang? He was the one that fucked me in the first place. He tried again. Damnit! Will you never believe anything I try to say to you?"

Moving away from me, he knelt down and checked the doctor. He sighed and stood back up. "He's dead. Tell me what happened."

"I just did," I hissed.

He shook his head. "From the beginning."

"What's the point? You refused to listen before. Why should I tell you now? Plus…" That was the last word I got out before my mind completely shut down.

I don't know how long I was asleep, but when I woke back up. Al was sitting beside me. "What happened?" I ask, hearing my own scratchy voice.

"Are you okay?"

"Fine. Answer my question."

"They took the body of your doctor away. The drug he injected you with knocked you out for a few hours. Mustang is going to stop by later to take your statement. He's going to clear your name of the murder."

I glared at him. "It was self-defense."

"Brother, obviously your mad at the colonel, but you need to stop taking it out on me. When he enters in, why don't you unleash all that rage on him?"

I got out of bed and grabbed my clothes that were folded on the chair next to me. I didn't care that my feet could barely hold my weight. I was tired of this. Al didn't say anything the entire time I put my clothes on. In fact, he sat there silent as I walked around the bed. "Coming with me?" I opened the door and stared up at coal eyes. "Mustang." Al rose from his seat and walked out of the door, slamming it behind him after Mustang entered. "What do you want?"

"I see your healthy again. Are you ready to tell me what happened from the beginning?"

I growled and tried to walk around him, but he grabbed me. I slammed my fist into his face and watched him tumble backwards. Knowing that I've now ruined my career as a state alchemist, I looked at the watch hanging from my waist. I slammed it down on the bed and approached him. He neither flinched nor backed away from the anger that was clearly pouring out of every pore. "Everything is your fault! If you would have never jumped to conclusions before I even had a chance to tell you that I was that cat, nothing would have happened. I wouldn't have pain in places that shouldn't have pain. I wouldn't be considering walking away from this army and spending the rest of my life as someone's whore because that's all I'm good for now. I've pissed my brother off enough that he won't follow me. He won't ever see what his dear older brother has turned into. You can take that watch and shove it as far up your tight ass as possible. Then maybe you'd feel what I had to endure."

Mustang's face dropped it's emotionless form and I could clearly see the pain in it. "Edward, please sit down." I didn't want to listen to him, but something inside of me wanted to give him another chance. I sighed and sat down on the bed. Mustang moved over and knelt down in front of me. "First off. I don't ever want to hear you say that you're a whore. You're far from it. I'm sorry. You are right. I'm the one responsible for all of this. I failed you. I just hope somewhere, sometime you'd be able to forgive me." He picked up the watch and placed it gently in my hand, closing my fist. "Don't give up your alchemy or on your brother. I'm going to give you all the time you need to recover. The only thing I request is that you remain here in Central. You won't have to report to me until you're ready to return to the field." He placed his hand on my knee. Everything felt different. The anger seemed to melt away, but I wasn't ready to forgive him yet even if it wasn't his fault. "If you need anything, you're welcomed to come to me or any of my men."

I nodded as he rose. I reached up and grabbed his sleeve. "Will you wait for me?" I don't know what made me ask it. I don't even know what the true meaning behind that was, but I wanted only one answer.

"As long as it takes."

And he gave it to me. I smiled and lowered my head. "You have a deal. If you see my brother, can you ask him to come see me?"

"Of course."

He walked out the door but not out of my life. I couldn't have gotten as far as I did in my life without the help of all my friends and brother. I am proud to admit that once I write the last five words in this journal, my therapist says that I'll be ready to return to my normal life. I'll be the first to admit that I will never be the same again, but change isn't always bad. Sometimes life is for the better if you walk down a different path. Al and I haven't gotten any closer in discovering the Philosopher's Stone, but we'll do it one day. Wish me luck. In one week I'm going to confront Mustang and finally say the words that he wanted to hear. "I forgive you, Roy Mustang."

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I'm going to start working on chapter ten right away, but it's going to be different from all the other chapters. I feel like making something cute. Well, until tomorrow. Thanks for reading please review.

Angel Dove


	10. Chapter 10

Welcome all who want to read this chapter. This is pure yaoi goodness. It's a little epilogue to the story, but mostly Roy/Ed. I would like to take this time to thank you all for reviewing my chapters and reading them. It makes me feel great when I have a story that hits over 1000 before I even have a chance to finish it. Thank you all again. I greatly appreciate it. As for what the next story is going to be if you follow me around, I have no clue. Hopefully I'll have another story in some category within a month or two, depending on how life is. Remember this chapter isn't like the other ones. You'll see what I mean in the first sentence.

Warning: Yaoi goodness. M/M between Ed/Roy. If you don't like it then don't read this chapter. It's for all of us who love yaoi. Allow me to quote my favorite phrase: "Yaoi, my anti-drug"

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Chapter Ten

Roy closed the book and placed it back on the shelf. He secretly wiped the tears away from his eyes. He knew a little about what Ed went through, but he never expected it being that difficult. Schiezka told him about this interesting book she read buried deep in the heart of the new branch library. He just thought she found a new book and ignored it for a few days. Few days turned into months and finally he decided to check it out. He never expected it to be something Ed wrote.

He picked up the small brown journal again and ran his finger over it. Apparently Ed was planning on see him a week after putting this journal in the library, but maybe he didn't have the courage yet. He wasn't going to push him. Turning through the pages one more time, Roy smiled. He placed it back on the shelf and turned away. The library was deserted except for a few people reading various books on alchemy and chemistry. No one lifted their head or paid attention to the colonel as he passed them and walked back outside.

The air was cooler, but he paid no attention to it. He wrapped his jacket around himself tighter and tracked through the thin layer of snow that happened to fall while he was reading the journal. Choosing not to go home early, Roy walked up the stairs to enter into headquarters. His men stood and saluted him. "At ease, men," he commented, entering into his office. Piles of paperwork sat on each end of the desk. One pile needed to be read through while the others just needed signed. Ever since the incident with Ed, Roy was more in tune with finishing all his paperwork. He ran his fingers over the couch that sat in front of his desk. He remembered all the times he would tease Ed about his missions.

The door slowly opened that Roy didn't hear it at first. Ed smiled at Roy sliding his finger over the couch. He cleared his throat. "Fullmetal," the older man said. "How have you been?"

Ed took a deep breath and walked over to the couch. Sitting on the left side, he glanced over the pile of paperwork to look at Roy. "I'm fine. Looks like you haven't gotten a handle on your paperwork."

Roy glanced over at the letters. "Nah. This is only a day's worth. I spent the morning in the library." Ed smiled and got up, standing directly in front of it.

"I've come to take you up on that offer. I wish to return to researching the Philosopher's Stone. And I wish to tell you something." Ed licked his lips and shifted nervously. "I've come to apologized. I know I blamed you for everything, but I know now you weren't the one to blame."

Roy leaned forward. "You have nothing to apologize for. Welcome back, Edward."

Ed smiled and walked around the other side of the desk. "What no welcome back present?"

"You took too long to come back. I had to give it away to someone else already." Ed laughed and stood directly in front of Roy.

"To think a year ago and I wouldn't have thought that was funny. I'm going to take one last risk before I leave to research some of the rumors we heard." Roy glanced up at Ed's golden eyes.

"And what would that risk be?"

Ed took a deep breath and climbed into Roy's chair. He kissed him passionately. At first Roy didn't respond and Ed backed away. He started to get off Roy when he wrapped his arms around the smaller man and pushed him against his desk. Their lips danced together each trying to win dominance. The kiss deepened with Roy slipping his tongue into Ed's lips. Ed moaned and pulled himself further up on the desk. "Wait," he tried to say in-between kisses. "Mustang, someone could walk in."

Roy pulled away from Ed and walked over to the door. Fearing that he was being kicked out, Ed lifted himself off the desk and stood up. Roy turned the lock and looked back at Ed with a devilish grin. He smiled and pushed everything off the desk. "You're cleaning that up later, Fullmetal."

"Whatever." Roy pushed Ed backwards until his butt hit against the edge of the desk, but wouldn't let him climb up on it. He reached down and pulled the jacket and shirt off of Ed quicker than he locked the door. He sucked and kissed along the smaller man's chest, making love marks as he lowered himself. He was moving quickly, desperate to get things moving incase it was just a dream. Ed was equally as excited and didn't care how fast they did as long as they did.

Roy lifted Ed up and lied him across the desk. He continued to lick this tongue along Ed's stomach, enjoying the shivers he felt running through Ed's body. Working, Ed's pants, he pulled them down and off along with his boxers. "Mustang, you're not doing this just to make me feel better are you?"

"I've had feelings for you for awhile, but didn't want to act on them. We have a great difference in age. Plus I'm your boss. If this is what you really want, I'll give you everything you want." Ed pulled Roy down and kissed him. Roy smiled into the kiss and ran his fingers along Ed's body. He shivered and moaned while his fingers worked with the buttons of his shirt. Slowly revealing his muscular chest, Ed ran his fingers along every joint and muscle.

He wrapped his mouth around his member. Ed jumped and arched his back off the desk, but he pushed Ed back down. The sensations were running through Ed faster than he ever remembered. "Roy," he gasped. "I'm going to…Roy!" Ed exploded into his mouth. Roy licked his lips and smiled down at the younger man. "Come inside of me," Ed begged.

Roy ran his fingers along the side of his face. "Are you sure you're ready?" Ed sat up off the desk and reached down to Roy's pants. He pushed them down partly and jumped into his arms, wrapping his legs around his waist. Roy moaned and moved them over to the couch. "Then we are doing it my way. Nice and gentle."

"I wouldn't have it any other way." Roy reached behind Ed and into the couch, pulling out a tube of lubrication. "Do I even want to know?"

"Long nights," Roy said with a shrug. Ed smiled and wrapped his legs around his waist. Roy gently placed one slick finger inside of Ed, finding the bundle of nerves and brushing his finger over it. Ed moaned, enjoying the shivers that rolled down his spin. The pleasure was more than he would have imagined. He barely noticed the second and third finger sliding in just as gently as the first one. The pleasure just about made him explode a second time, but he held back as long as he could.

Roy slid into him slowly, making sure his body adjusted to him before pulling back out and sliding back in again. Ed tilted his head back, releasing the loudest moan so far that night. Starting slow, Roy enjoyed the tightness of being inside of Ed. "Oh, Ed," he moaned adjusting his speed and angle until he hit Ed's prostate. Ed leaned up and kissed Roy to help quiet his own moans. Every thrust to his prostate left stars in his eyes and a feeling that made him droll.

"Oh, Roy," Ed gasped. "Harder. Oh, yeah, just like that." After several more direct hits to Ed's prostate, he released spreading his cum all over Roy's and his stomach. Feeling spent, Ed relaxed his body and allowed Roy to continue until he felt him release deep inside of him. Ed wrapped his arms around Roy and kissed him deeply. "I love you."

Roy smiled at Ed. "I love you too." After a few minutes of cuddling, Roy rose and retrieved their clothes. By the time he returned to Ed, he noticed that the younger man was already asleep. Putting on his clothes, Roy went to work on the challenge task of dressing Ed without waking him. He ran his finger along Ed's face before pulling a blanket out from under the couch and lying it over him. He went about cleaning all the papers and items back on his desk.

Once everything was in order, Roy unlocked the door to allow anyone to come into his office. He sat down at the desk and started on his paperwork. Hours went by and he hadn't even noticed until a quiet knock came at the door. He glanced over at Ed realizing that he didn't even wake. He got up and opened the door holding his finger to his lips. Al looked over Roy's shoulder to Ed, sleeping peacefully on the couch. "I suppose he told you."

"Yes."

Al laughed quietly. "That's great. I'll leave him with you tonight."

"I'll take good care of him. Don't worry." Al bowed and left the room. Roy closed the door and curled up on the couch with Ed. He moaned in his sleep before curling up next to the colonel.

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Thank you all for reading. I hope this was okay.

Angel Dove


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